Like the title asks, I'd (f19) like to know other people's opinions on this conversation I had with my mom. At the time, it felt right to send the text but now I feel that it was either too much or completely wrong.
We were talking about going to the cottage this weekend (she and the rest of the family are either already there, or were going up yesterday). I did not feel like going on a three hour drive to the cottage this weekend so I decided to stay at home. My mom prefers that everyone goes up to the cottage and this is the first time that I actually decided not to.
Usually, when I deliberate going up to the cottage, my mom will ask: why don't I want to go? Is there something you can do here that you can't do up there? Or, "we'll talk about it later" when I'm leaning more towards a no. Etc. Which is a bit frustrating because she don't take "I don't feel like going up" as a valid answer. This time, I think I blew that out of proportion.
M - mom P - guru_potato
Hi guru_potato, what did you decide about the weekend?
[P] Im not coming up
M] aww why not?
[M] Hello? We are dissapointed. What are your plans?
[P] Really? You're trying to be emotionally manipulative to make me feel guilty about my choice? I dont feel like going up to the cottage
[M] Wow. That's very very harsh. Sorry for letting you know you are missed. I did not intend to "manipulate" at all since your ride has already left. I will leave you alone.
I just feel like if she had wanted to let me know I was missed, she could have worded it differently. But I also now feel guilty for jumping to conclusions due to frustration.
Tldr: accused my mom of being emotionally manipulative.
Edit: thank you for your perspectives, here's an apology I was thinking of sending. Is it too much or too little?
Hi mom, I'm sorry for being harsh. I was tired and frustrated and took "we are dissapointed" in the wrong way. To be transparent, I am working over the weekend to recover lost work due to a back up error. That is why I did not feel like going up. You are not emotionally manipulative and nor was your text message manipulative. I see that now and am sorry for accusing you of being so. I know how it feels to be accused of something you didn't do so I hope you can forgive me at some point.